Blogiversary

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Somehow it’s the 1 year anniversary of my blog…which basically means that TIME FLIES! My first post was about green bagels on St. Paddy’s Day  (Green Bagel Morning), which we dutifully ate again this year.

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I’ve really enjoyed blogging over the past year. I’ve loved the connections that I’ve made with people, and this blog REALLY REALLY helped me out when Emmy went into cardiac arrest after heart surgery last May (You can do it, Emmy!!!). I never in a billion years thought that I would be blogging while my daughter was on life support. It seems almost trivial. Blogging while your kid is on life support?? What??  I’m not even that much of a social media person, so it doesn’t seem to fit my character.

But oh-my-gosh, did it help!!! The messages of encouragement kept me going. And the support was incredible. I felt as though we were lifted through that entire experience on the shoulders of others. I didn’t feel like I was going through it alone.

I still get rattled when I look back on my blog posts during that time. It can bring me right back to that hospital room in a split second. It’s surreal to be so far removed from that experience now–physically removed but not mentally… Never mentally.

I have two favorite posts from the past year. I mulled over These Are The Shoes for a LONG time before I wrote it. Every time I opened Emmy’s drawer, those shoes would stare at me. And every time I thought, “I have to write about this feeling to get it out of me.” I’ve mentioned a few times that writing is like therapy for me. When something eats away at me, it’s all I can think about. And then once I get it down on paper, the immediate relief is unbelievable. Seeing those shoes every day really affected me and then, once I wrote about it, I was able to let it go. Amazingly, the shoes don’t bother me anymore.

My other favorite post is In Love. I LOVE that picture of Emmy. She looks like she’s shining from the inside out. That post represents a divide for me. I felt as though I let Williams syndrome come between Emmy and me for a long time. I was very aware of the fact that she has Williams syndrome. I thought about the implications a lot, and it kept me at a distance from her. This was totally unconscious on my part, but it happened nonetheless. We went through hell during her heart surgery and recovery and, while I would never want to go through something like that ever again, it helped me realize that Emmy is my daughter first and foremost. I no longer saw her as “my daughter, but let’s not forget that she has Williams syndrome.” I saw her as my daughter. Period. End of story.

And even though this blog is called Williams Syndrome Smile, my older daughter Charlotte, and husband Dan, (and the new baby soon!) have all played a significant role as well. I think this is more about life in general. Parenting is a minefield, I tell you. Having a child with special needs might color some of my experiences in a different way, but 99% of the time, I’m doing the normal things that every parent does. My #1 goal in life is to not screw up my kids…and yet I can guarantee that I’m already doing something wrong. (And it’s probably the thing that I think I’m actually doing right!! That’s the irony of it all.)

Thank you so much for reading and sharing, everyone!! I’m looking forward to Year #2.

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12 thoughts on “Blogiversary

  1. Congrats! I love your blog and you are a wonderful writer. (Also, my daughter Rose, who is looking over my shoulder as I type, just asked about Emmy’s picture and then said “that’s my friend.” I hope they get to play together one day!)

  2. Happy Blogiversary! I can’t believe it’s been a whole year! Holy guacamole! (which is also green. So there.) I have loved reading all your stories. Looking forward to the future ones!

  3. First, I would like to congrats you on your first year of blogging , and second I would love to thank you .
    I am not a social media person too, but your blog helps me a lot . It gives me inspiration and speaks my mind 😉
    My name is mayssa and my precious talina 2.5, has Williams syndrome , we found out right on her first birthday .
    Thank you for being there ☺️

    • Thank you, Mayssa! I’m so glad you found my blog. Our girls are the same age! Wow, that must have been quite a shock to find out about Williams syndrome on Talina’s first birthday.

      I’m glad we’re able to share the journey together. 🙂 Thank you for reading!

      Vanessa

  4. Happy Anniversary! Funny how you say “my goal is not to screw up my kids” Lol. Never thought about it that way but yeah it makes so much sense! That is my goal too! ANd yes writing is therapy for sure. Keep it up.

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